I'm so proud of our rabbi, Joel Abraham, and all of the other Reform rabbis who testified for same-sex marriage in New Jersey yesterday! See the video:
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
How to Form a Chavurah (And Why)
“When you don’t have any family nearby, you make your own family.” That was the advice my mom gave me when I moved to the east coast from Kansas. (She herself moved with my dad from Michigan to Kansas City to raise us, so she knows what she's talking about.) That's why, when my good friend Leslie Klieger invited us to help her form a new chavurah with some other families she knew, we jumped at the chance.
So what is this group and why is it important to us? Leslie explains:
“Around the time I became a bat mitzvah, my family joined a chavurah. It was a new experience for us as we weren't a particularly Jewishly active family. High holy days, Chanukah, Passover were pretty much the sum total of our Jewish life. I don't know what motivated my mom to get us involved with these 12 other families, but the decision she made had a lasting impact on my life.
“The word chavurah is commonly translated as 'fellowship.' In practice, a chavurah is a group of people—couples, families or individuals—who come together on a regular basis to celebrate, learn and socialize within a Jewish framework. Our chavurah met throughout the year to celebrate holidays—lunch in someone's sukkah, second night Pesach seder—as well as for learning opportunities for the adults and the occasional social get-together. It brought the Jewish calendar into my life in a way I had never experienced before and we made friendships that lasted a lifetime. (When my mom passed away, I was amazed how many people from our chavurah came to shivah though I hadn't seen them in years).
“Not long ago, I found myself frustrated by the lack of Jewish opportunities in our community for families with young children. Just before Shavuot, I looked around for somewhere to take my four-year-old twins and found nothing appropriate for our family. This motivated me to form a chavurah, remembering the wonderful experiences I had as a child. Because of the young ages of my children, I realized that the group had to be relatively small in order to be manageable. I asked a few friends with similarly aged kids, all with different levels of Jewish observance, some who are members of synagogues and some who aren't, to join me in creating it.
"What we have formed is a closed group (in order to foster closer relationships among participants) that has thus far come together to celebrate Sukkot and Chanukah. Each family volunteered to host and organize one holiday gathering this year so that responsibility is shared, and our events are all potluck to avoid too much work for any one family. It is an ongoing creation that will be continually defined by our group—we might do Shabbat dinners, join together for a mitzvah opportunity or have an evening of adult learning. (And wine. Definitely with wine.) We will figure out together what will enhance our experience and create a vibrant Jewish life for our families.
“Judaism is not a religion meant to be practiced alone; I hope that our chavurah will provide a vehicle for our families to learn and socialize and celebrate and grow together for many years to come.”
Do you have experience with a chavurah? Tell us about it!
“The word chavurah is commonly translated as 'fellowship.' In practice, a chavurah is a group of people—couples, families or individuals—who come together on a regular basis to celebrate, learn and socialize within a Jewish framework. Our chavurah met throughout the year to celebrate holidays—lunch in someone's sukkah, second night Pesach seder—as well as for learning opportunities for the adults and the occasional social get-together. It brought the Jewish calendar into my life in a way I had never experienced before and we made friendships that lasted a lifetime. (When my mom passed away, I was amazed how many people from our chavurah came to shivah though I hadn't seen them in years).
“Not long ago, I found myself frustrated by the lack of Jewish opportunities in our community for families with young children. Just before Shavuot, I looked around for somewhere to take my four-year-old twins and found nothing appropriate for our family. This motivated me to form a chavurah, remembering the wonderful experiences I had as a child. Because of the young ages of my children, I realized that the group had to be relatively small in order to be manageable. I asked a few friends with similarly aged kids, all with different levels of Jewish observance, some who are members of synagogues and some who aren't, to join me in creating it.
"What we have formed is a closed group (in order to foster closer relationships among participants) that has thus far come together to celebrate Sukkot and Chanukah. Each family volunteered to host and organize one holiday gathering this year so that responsibility is shared, and our events are all potluck to avoid too much work for any one family. It is an ongoing creation that will be continually defined by our group—we might do Shabbat dinners, join together for a mitzvah opportunity or have an evening of adult learning. (And wine. Definitely with wine.) We will figure out together what will enhance our experience and create a vibrant Jewish life for our families.
“Judaism is not a religion meant to be practiced alone; I hope that our chavurah will provide a vehicle for our families to learn and socialize and celebrate and grow together for many years to come.”
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Comforting the Bereaved
I talk a lot on here about celebrations, but of course Judaism has taught me a lot about unhappy times, as well. While a teenager at Congregation Beth Torah in Overland Park, Kansas, I remember Rabbi Mark Levin talking to a group of us about comforting those who mourn. “It doesn’t matter what you say,” he told us. “Just be there.” That really stuck with me.
This week I wrote an article for The Alternative Press about a new center opening in Westfield for children grieving the loss of a parent or sibling and their caregivers. Read it here. They’re looking for volunteers. Not necessarily professionals—just “loving listeners.” In other words, adults who are willing to listen and comfort without trying to “fix” the problem.
The first training session will take place at the end of March. What a wonderful opportunity! What a great skill! Learning to face our own discomfort and help those who are grieving—especially children—may be one of the most important things we can do. If you know or someone you know is interested in becoming a facilitator, you can contact the center at volunteer@imaginenj.org.
If your family or a family you know is grieving (and close enough to drive to Westfield), contact info@imaginenj.org to find out how you can benefit.
This week I wrote an article for The Alternative Press about a new center opening in Westfield for children grieving the loss of a parent or sibling and their caregivers. Read it here. They’re looking for volunteers. Not necessarily professionals—just “loving listeners.” In other words, adults who are willing to listen and comfort without trying to “fix” the problem.
The first training session will take place at the end of March. What a wonderful opportunity! What a great skill! Learning to face our own discomfort and help those who are grieving—especially children—may be one of the most important things we can do. If you know or someone you know is interested in becoming a facilitator, you can contact the center at volunteer@imaginenj.org.
If your family or a family you know is grieving (and close enough to drive to Westfield), contact info@imaginenj.org to find out how you can benefit.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Ritual Objects
How is it that I’ve never owned a challah cover? My husband and I have various ritual objects given as gifts at lifecycle events (Kiddush cups, menorahs, candlesticks) as well as things we bought for ourselves, but never one of these.
I’d been meaning to buy a one for a while, so when I saw a 50-percent-off deal on JDeal for Nashoma Network, I decided that that was the cue I’d been waiting for. It arrived last week and we used it for the first time on Friday.
I really love that we added this beautiful object to our Friday night ritual. As my children grow, I hope to keep adding traditions like this one to our lives.
I’d been meaning to buy a one for a while, so when I saw a 50-percent-off deal on JDeal for Nashoma Network, I decided that that was the cue I’d been waiting for. It arrived last week and we used it for the first time on Friday.
I really love that we added this beautiful object to our Friday night ritual. As my children grow, I hope to keep adding traditions like this one to our lives.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Sukkah Sale!
It seems that the best time to buy a sukkah is ... right after Hannukah. Right now The Sukkkah Project is holding a special Double Chai clearance sale. Just enter the coupon code "CHAI" when you check out and get 18 percent off anything in stock until January 18.
It looks like now's the time for me to buy that bamboo mat roof.
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