Tuesday, January 24, 2012

How to Form a Chavurah (And Why)

“When you don’t have any family nearby, you make your own family.” That was the advice my mom gave me when I moved to the east coast from Kansas. (She herself moved with my dad from Michigan to Kansas City to raise us, so she knows what she's talking about.) That's why, when my good friend Leslie Klieger invited us to help her form a new chavurah with some other families she knew, we jumped at the chance.
So what is this group and why is it important to us? Leslie explains:
“Around the time I became a bat mitzvah, my family joined a chavurah. It was a new experience for us as we weren't a particularly Jewishly active family. High holy days, Chanukah, Passover were pretty much the sum total of our Jewish life. I don't know what motivated my mom to get us involved with these 12 other families, but the decision she made had a lasting impact on my life.

“The word chavurah is commonly translated as 'fellowship.' In practice, a chavurah is a group of people—couples, families or individuals—who come together on a regular basis to celebrate, learn and socialize within a Jewish framework. Our chavurah met throughout the year to celebrate holidays—lunch in someone's sukkah, second night Pesach seder—as well as for learning opportunities for the adults and the occasional social get-together. It brought the Jewish calendar into my life in a way I had never experienced before and we made friendships that lasted a lifetime. (When my mom passed away, I was amazed how many people from our chavurah came to shivah though I hadn't seen them in years).

“Not long ago, I found myself frustrated by the lack of Jewish opportunities in our community for families with young children. Just before Shavuot, I looked around for somewhere to take my four-year-old twins and found nothing appropriate for our family. This motivated me to form a chavurah, remembering the wonderful experiences I had as a child. Because of the young ages of my children, I realized that the group had to be relatively small in order to be manageable. I asked a few friends with similarly aged kids, all with different levels of Jewish observance, some who are members of synagogues and some who aren't, to join me in creating it.

"What we have formed is a closed group (in order to foster closer relationships among participants) that has thus far come together to celebrate Sukkot and Chanukah. Each family volunteered to host and organize one holiday gathering this year so that responsibility is shared, and our events are all potluck to avoid too much work for any one family. It is an ongoing creation that will be continually defined by our group—we might do Shabbat dinners, join together for a mitzvah opportunity or have an evening of adult learning. (And wine. Definitely with wine.) We will figure out together what will enhance our experience and create a vibrant Jewish life for our families.

“Judaism is not a religion meant to be practiced alone; I hope that our chavurah will provide a vehicle for our families to learn and socialize and celebrate and grow together for many years to come.”
Do you have experience with a chavurah? Tell us about it!

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